Nothing is more helpful than having your husband pick you up from work, take you grocery shopping, or even drop you and the kids off at the mall on the weekend. Family rides can be a lot of fun. But there’s a good number of women who tend to suffer from driving anxiety as a passenger when their better half is at the wheel. They have anxiety when husband drives, sometimes for good reasons.
In general, the fear of riding in a car is known as amaxophobia. But why exactly do some wives suffer from this problem when their husbands are driving? Better yet, how can they deal with or overcome this condition? Here are some things you should know if you get anxiety when your husband drives.
Common Causes of Anxiety When Husband Drives
There are many causes of passenger anxiety. However, passenger anxiety when your husband is behind the wheel tends to be a bit more specific. Some of the causes may include:
- Drunk driving – This might sound a bit cliched, but truth be told, many men drive drunk. And if you’re married to the guy, you can probably tell if he’s had a few drinks or not. It is absolutely normal to feel uncomfortable as a passenger to a drunk driver. Under those circumstances, it is highly likely that anxiety will kick in. Anxiety is warrented when riding with someone who’s driving drunk. The best solution is to never, EVER ride with a drunk driver!
- Speeding and/or reckless driving – Compared to women, men tend to enjoy putting their foot on the accelerator more. Most men are likely to drive fast, perhaps pulling some stunts they might think are cool. On the other hand, most women prefer careful, focused, and perhaps slow driving. It is not uncommon to suffer from passenger anxiety when your husband is an over-speeding or “reckless” type of driver.
- Past experiences – Maybe he was behind the wheel and hit a pole or caused a car accident where you almost sustained injuries. Past traumatic experiences can contribute to making you uncomfortable as a passenger with your husband as the driver.
Possible Solutions For Your Passenger Anxiety
If your husband has been driving drunk, it’s best to address his alcohol problem rather than dealing with your anxiety.
If he’s driving sober, however, and you still suffer from passenger anxiety, there are a few things you can do to overcome the fear or deal with the issue.
- Have a talk with him (to avoid aggressive driving) – He might be the best driver in town, but you’re not comfortable when he goes too fast. Let him know and try to avoid this when he’s carrying you as a passenger.
- Keep calm – Sometimes just staying calm and focusing on the positive can be a helpful way to rid yourself of passenger anxiety. You may want to incorporate various ways of calming your nerves, including deep breathing, distracting yourself, relaxing your muscles and reciting some positive affirmations. Hypnosis can also be very helpful for keeping calm in difficult situations.
- Prevent trigger situations – When you’re running late to an event or you get lost on the way, these situations can trigger aggressive driving. You can eliminate these by planning your trip early and leaving enough time to get to your destination. In some cases, you could also offer to drive if it makes you more comfortable.
The above pointers may not be an exhaustive list, but they clearly paint the basic picture. Anxiety when husband drives is a common problem that affects many women. With the solution tips above, you will probably feel more comfortable the next time you’re riding with your husband behind the wheel.

3 thoughts on “Anxiety When Husband Drives”
It was so good to read the comments to people with similar anxiety.
My husband is in the main, a good driver- sticks to the speed limit, doesn’t tailgate, is respectful towards other drivers- BUT- he has a hair trigger reaction to other drivers who either make a mistake or act in an aggressive pushy manner in that he won’t give way and think that they shouldn’t get away with it. For example- someone overtaking in the opposite direction on a normal road and has mistimed it or is being pushy, he will keep his speed up to the point that we have had several near misses. To me this is unsafe driving and even if someone is being a bad driver, defer and keep safe.
I have reached the point where I don’t want to sit with him as a passenger as I am waiting for a crash to happen.
Hi Jackie –
I just wanted to tell you that you summed up my driving issues precisely…up until just now,I felt I was alone.
Thank you : ))
There are a lot of ways to feel good about yourself, and making sure that you start doing them now is one of the best ways to regain your sense of confidence in both yourself and your future.